It’s been an especially difficult and exhausting couple of weeks. The other day a friend of mine shared that she’d been asked the question, “what are the conditions you need in order to thrive.”

I’ve reflected on that for myself and in terms of our movements and communities. There is so much work for us to do, real, heavy, long term work. What do we need to build the deep solidarity necessary to keep going? To fuel us? To hold ourselves, our communities, and institutions accountable?

We need each other.

I often say that we must love each other and mean it.

Not Disney fantasy love, not lip service love but instead a deep, difficult, hard-won, and sustained love. A love that is built upon self-reflection, built upon staying in the right relationship with others, built upon a type of struggle that embraces boundaries and understands conflict can be a means for growth. A love not shy of tears or pain.

A deep love of community.

A type of love we’ve never experienced in this country.

I want to live a type of love in which I look at where I live and work and really see the people around me, my friends and my family and know they’re not perfect and that’s ok. A love that remains even when I see people who look like me, people that are my kin, and yet they vote against my interest. I am talking about a love that does not disregard nor dismiss but a love that will sit in discomfort and get through it to stay alongside my neighbor. A love in which they extend the same. It will require imagination, repair, and humility.

This is a love that shatters myths.

The myths of supremacy and power. A love that fuels our work to eradicate systems of oppression. A love that connects us to each other’s pain and joy. That builds relationships based on care,  –even though your problem is “not my problem” it becomes mine because of the deep care that I have for you.

This is what I want for this country. I don’t know if it’s possible but it’s the love that I wish for us every day.

Let’s love each other and mean it.